When I first came to Peru three years ago, I found a community of language learners: some learning English, some learning Spanish.

I was learning Spanish, armed with high school vocab and an impressive Duolingo streak (250 days!).

Yet it was not past experience, nor commitment to an app, that indicated anyone’s success.

Nor was it grit, or birth order, or getting up early.

What separated those who progressed from those who plateaued was this:

The willingness to sound dumb.

That’s it.

Those who were willing to sound like a toddler when we spoke–not just during classes, but among friends, around strangers, around a crush–were the ones whose language improved.

In order to progress, you have to be willing to be a beginner.

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This is especially difficult for people who always want to sound smart.

(I’ll sneak this in here… I believe this is easier for women than men. Not that women love sounding dumb. But we may be more socialized to tolerate it. Not that every man is a know-it-all. But many men have tied intellect and superiority to their identity.)

That said, anyone can, at any time, choose to let go of the desire to sound smart, and embrace the toddler phase.

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Willingness to be wrong is an absolute superpower.

Don’t underestimate it.

It’s fun, actually. You can play. Ask questions. Make mistakes. Splash around for a while in this new thing, whether it’s a language, a project, a book.

The key is to relax. And to find people around whom you can relax.

People who don’t mind if you sound like a beginner for a while.

Those are your biggest allies when you’re in a growth phase. Not those you have to sound smart around.

Toddlers are total sponges of information. And while we can’t go back to that phase literally, we can go back to it in spirit, while we learn and grow and work on a new project.

Embrace the toddler phase.

Here’s to new beginners.

If you’re thinking about writing a book, and need someone you can be a beginner around, talk to me.

I’m Kimberly, and I’m a ghostwriter and book coach specializing in helping people write the memoirs and business books that they feel called to write.